I had an appointment with my shrink today. What? You don't have one of those? You really should look into getting one (make certain they come equipped with a Lazy Boy because, Ahhhhhh and sometimes Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz). The boys were at school but the "Little She" had to tag along. Of course I crammed my bag full of toys. Actually they were more like pieces of toys because nothing in our house would actually qualify as a whole toy these days. Anyway, as I sat down to therip-ify she immediately whipped out a Cinderella doll from I don't know where. Technically I'm against any doll that's suggestive of an unachievable boob to waist ratio. Or any toy with boobs, really. But I made an exception here because Rich Sister-in-law just got back from Disneyland and deemed it necessary to "buy the kids a little something". Turns out my 2 year olds "little something" has some serious fun bags and removable clothing. So, Shrink Dude and I got to talking and I let the discovery of the Cinderella doll slide. Bad call. Because about 2 minutes later the Little She handed me Cinderella's clothes and then proceeded to say, "Cinna-ella's bar ne-ked Mommy. Her's boops er blue, see?" Oh, I see Honey. Now go sit down and play with your naked princess while Mommy gets slapped with a law suit. And while your at it, would you like a little Heineken in your sippy?
And here's where I try to redeem myself a little bit. My kindergarten kid? He was totally "U". I gotta hand it to him for actually linking arms with "Q" in the midst of his girls have cooties phase.
Did you notice the two little home boys in the back? They seemed to have missed the memo regarding "Sunday best". Or maybe they were the DJs. And here's where anyone who's a liberal is going to want to exit. Like now. Unless you can refrain from sending me hate mail. Because I'm about to make a snarky remark about our professionally lame government. Since when did "change" become socialism? Good to see we're headed to hell in a handcart. Don't hate me because I'm a conservative.
5 comments:
1. shrink a good idea for everyone at some point.
2. why does cinderella have blue boops?
3. call me a conservative also, hell here we come!
I think E looks great! Can't wait to see you all next week! And Trust me you say the word conservative up here you get alot of people angry with you.
It could have been so much worse though right... she could have made comparisons to your body or something, that would have trouble with the mandated court reporter (i.e.shrink) all over it. i love me some letter people. i think our wedding is next month, sweet!
Don't feel bad, Nora tells everyone that baby Gavin eats mommy's "boos", and what color his poop is.
i'm so glad my kids haven't noticed "boops" yet--maybe that's because i don't have any anymore!
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